When autobiographies go bad: reality stars and book deals.

Autobiographies are supposed to be books about someone’s life written by that same someone… In other cases it is written by another person and is then called a ‘biography’. Pretty simple right?

It seems there are different rules when it comes to ‘reality TV stars’.

A fantastic interview from a UK publication Now Magazine was printed recently where they interviewed ‘celebrity’ Gemma Collins from television series The Only Way Is Essex (or: TOWIE).

It came to light that Gemma ‘I’m a big fan of the dictionary‘ Collins (yes she really said that in an interview once) is likely to have never read her own book -let alone written it. In a car-crash interview, printed in full by Now Magazine, the celeb and the journalist created what could be the worst interview about a book ever.

I salute you @nowmag - you’re killing it 😂 pic.twitter.com/onkYdby3OF
— Coco (@cjrutter) 26 June 2018

The terrible interview makes for a cringe-worthy but solidly entertaining as we read Gemma Collins seemingly echoing John Lennon by claiming her ‘autobiography’ would be “bigger than the Bible. And do you know why? Because this is going to spread cheer like the Bible.”

YIKES.

How would she even know that since she has obviously not read her own book? It could be a terribly depressing affair full of grit and drama… It’s not- it’s actual fluff in text form but still- she didn’t know that.

In fact in one part of the interview the journalist asks about the time she was bullied during her childhood, as reported in the book. Collins replied: “I’ve not read that bit in the book, where was that?” she said. “I’ve not seen that bit so I can’t comment on that.”

Again: YIKES.

In a television interview on a daytime television chat show Loose Women Gemma went further to say: “Well, I didn’t sit there writing it, no. “Basically, I got offered to do a book, yeah, and they said to me, ‘Look, Gem, you’re so busy, how about we get someone to walk around with you with a dictaphone?’”

Oh you mean like A WRITER?! God forbid you put the work in, right?

Fake tan, fake nails, fake writer… She even faked her travel plans by posting a stock photo of a ‘private jet’.

I am going in for a TRIPLE YIKES on this one.