There are some issues in life that are unavoidable but difficult to deal with, and the subject of death is the biggest of them all. Despite it being an inevitable occurrence, many of us do not want to think about it, let alone wonder how a child may view death or experience mourning.
Authors such as Neil Gaiman and Maurice Sendak have spoken in the past about the benefits of not hiding the darker aspects of life and death from children. In 1999 Children’s Laureate, Anthony Browne, dealt with the sometimes intense worry of a child in his book, Silly Billy (Available here: UK or US)
Through the death of grandparents, parents, lovers, friends, and pets, we all unfortunately experience a deep loss at some point in our lives and it is no surprised that we all need to know we are not alone in our pain.
Here is a list of the 5 most popular books available that can help children come to terms with the issues surrounding death, grieving, and loss.
Badger’s Parting Gifts- Susan Varley
This classic book by Susan Varley was on my bookshelf when I was a child and it deals with the theme of death of a dear friend with tenderness, and warmth. Badger knew he was dying as he was becoming slow and less able to play with his friends, but leaves them each a gift to remember him by…
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The Flat Rabbit- Bárður Oskarsson
This slightly odd but thoughtful story of a dog and a rat coming upon their dead friend in the middle of the street, and their decision on what to do with his flattened body. It does away with any trite platitudes, but instead offers “I don’t know” as an answer. This may seem an odd choice of book, but I think it beautifully reflects how many small children think and feel about the physical side of death. It is subtle and strange, and describes the quirky and naive thoughts that children may have.
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Grandad’s Island- Benji Davies
Young children will love the colourful illustrations of this lovely book. It takes us along a journey with a young boy and his grandfather as it explores themes of love and loss. Sensitive and subtle, this story is guaranteed to tug at the heartstrings with Davies’s charming characterisation.
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Up In Heaven- Emma Chichester Clark
This sweet story follows Daisy, a loyal old dog belonging to a boy called Arthur. After Daisy dies, she is up in Heaven, watching her boy as he struggles with his grief. She soon finds ways to show she is ok, and helps him on his way to being happy again. This is a beautiful story for any child who is grieving for a pet, and needs reassurance that their best friend is happy and not in any more pain now they have passed along the rainbow bridge.
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Wednesday Mourning- Olivia Adams
Written in accessible, poetic verse, this is the story of Wednesday and her bear Teddy. After suffering a huge loss, Wednesday finds she the world around her reflects her sorrow, and she finds it difficult to see anything but her grief. The clouds are teardrops, and her toys are too sad to play, but she and Teddy soon find ways to bring themselves out from their grieving, and find a smile to hang on to. I adore the clay model illustrations in this beautifully put together book.
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